Matters of the Heart
by Gregg Landsman
Summary: Breath of Fire fic:  Garr has to deal with his past when his conscience finally catches up with him.


Breath of Fire and all associated characters are the property of Capcom. All rights reserved.

This is just something I thought up while I was on vacation. Enjoy.

****

A MATTER OF HEART

_Why am I here? What meaning has all this?_

Garr sighs, standing before the flat stone plate, shaking his head.

Ladon will not come. The Dragon God, who's children he played a part in the genocide of, will not answer the Guardian's questions.

The seven foot tall gargoyle stares silently at the summoning place of the deity, turning to the town of Dragnier...

And gasps, gripping his chest.

He stumbles in his step, his Beast Spear keeping him upright...

Before he collapses, lifeless, to the ground.

And the image of the dragon appears on the plaque.

_Garr?_

Garr opens his eyes, standing in the dim hallway, laying his wings about him as a cloak as he looks around.

_Garr?_, the familiar, feminine voice again asks.

"Princess Nina?", he asks, "Princess, what has happened? Where are we?"

Giggling, the ten year old windian girl runs out, shaking a warning finger at the gargoyle.

"You've been bad, Garr," she says, "It looks like your time is up. But come with me. I'm sure we can figure something out. We always do, don't we?"

She runs back into the shadows, a light forming before him...and Garr covers his eyes at the blinding light and heat, bringing up his wings to protect him.

_Garr?_

He lowers his wing...and sees a table before him. At which is sitting a seventeen-year old Nina, the princess silently laying down cards before her.

"Garr, come forward. Sit, please."

Garr complies, sitting in the surprisingly sturdy chair as she collects the tarot cards in one hand.

"Tarot cards...my future?"

She shakes her head.

"Your past, Garr.", she says, laying the deck on the white-clothed table.

A single, thick drop of blood escapes from the cards, dripping down the deck, rolling down the tablecloth and falling on his lap. The sound of a beat echoes underneath them, so strong it shakes the table.

She parts the deck, revealing a single, blood-smeared card, leveling her serious gaze at him.

"Your future, Garr."

"It...is covered in blood. I cannot read it."

"And that is the point."

The only sound is Ryu Bateson climbing the aged, stone steps, towards the shrine of Ladon. He catches his breath as he reaches the top, looking up to greet his erstwhile ally...

And stops when he sees the Guardian collapsed on the stones.

"Garr?", he asks, running over, rolling the gargoyle onto his back, "Garr, wake up!"

The dragon-image's eyes flash.

_Away from him, my child,_ the deep voice says, _It is time._

A force grips Ryu, tossing him across the roof. And a cylinder of light surrounds Garr, barring any from moving him.

"You realize what this is, do you not?", an older Nina asks, her gossamer wings grown, her body and face matured to the point where she almost mirrors the Goddess's image, "Or do you not realize what has happened?"

He shakes his head, sighing. Images of the past few minutes come back to him as the beat continues, his hand holding the blood-soaked card.

"I went to speak with the Dragon God. To ask for a conference so I could know better what to ask the Goddess. Nina...what has happened?"

She smiles, faintly, showing wisdom in her eyes bellying her age.

"Your conscience has caught up to you, Guardian. Your heart simply can no longer support your past."

She gestures downward, Garr standing quickly.

To find that they are sitting atop a massive, beating heart.

And everything goes white.

"It was never fair, you know."

Garr opens his eyes, seeing the light gone...and sees that he now stands amid a forested green, birds chirping, animals moving about in their daily routine as the sun shines down on the vibrant, living world.

He turns, seeing a treehouse standing before him, and a single figure sitting on one of the logs surrounding it.

"But, hey, life ain't fair," Rei says, hopping down, "Don't that just beat all? Life stinks. But you get used to it."

"I understand. But why you?"

"Why me? Hell, beats me," Rei says, shrugging, "All I wanted to do was live out my life with my brothers. We had a great thing going on after the Gnu...I mean, yeah. It was just protecting it's dead kids...and yeah, maybe people did cause it in the first place."

He shakes his head, shoulders slumping.

"Maybe it was just karma that we got suckered by Loki. But Teepo never deserved that...Ryu never deserved it, either. People die, yeah. Some people only die temporarily. But I think it'd be better off if no one killed out of spite."

Garr nods, locking eyes with the woren.

"But that makes us different, hm?", he asks, "That we _have_ killed out of spite? That I did so out of duty, while you out of revenge? That perhaps we have always been the most alike of our group?"

"That's right. But I still did what I could to make up for it. It will take years and years and years to set things straight...but your redemption's simple."

Garr's eyes snap open as he feels eyes bore into him.

"All you've gotta do is turn around."

Nina and Rei run up the steps, warned something was wrong by a flash of light...and they see a dazed Ryu and a fallen Garr.

Nina runs to Ryu's side, helping him sit up as Rei walks over.

"What's with the big guy?", Rei asks, "He's...hey, is he-"

"I don't know," Ryu responds, "Something's happening..."

He shakily climbs to his feet, groaning as Nina helps him up.

"Ladon wants this to happen," he says, "We...we shouldn't interfere-"

Rei shrugs, walking over to Garr...and yelping as he's throne clear across the roof.

"Y...yeah. Maybe you're right..."

"You're dead, Garr."

Garr nods, sitting at the Arena pub, looking over to the horseman as he cleans a glass, pouring an amber liquid and placing it down in front of Garr, the liquid evaporating from that glass and all the bottles.

"I have guessed that, Sunder. Tell me, then. What is death like?"

The horseman gives off a small neigh, shrugging.

"Bottles in this bar are all empty. Think the metaphors are being laid on pretty thick, eh?", he asks with a chuckle, "Death, huh? Can't say I like it, but, hey, that's me...just drowning in my memories. You, on the other hand, shouldn't."

"Why? I did kill you."

The room shifts, Garr standing as they stand in the streets of the Arena's city, Sunder changed to the massive Stallion.

"Yeah, well, them's the breaks," the composite beast says, "But I was always a bastard. You ain't. You've always been the forward thinker."

"My entire quest is caused by my searching the past for answers. Nothing more."

"And about getting a kid you've grown attached to some answers of his own."

Garr nods, walking along the streets with what is now Balio, his blue eyes noticing the discolorations in the horeman's mane. Has it been this long since he struck them down?

"Life sucks, that's what they say," Balio says, "But, really, it's nothing worth dying over. Hey, we had a good life. We had money, laughs...mainly at the expense of others, but the strong always survive. We made money off that policy."

"You're no doubt roasting in the underworld."

"Yeah, but I've got a point. Just because I'm dead doesn't mean we need your company, Garr. It's time to face your fear. Turn around."

The eyes again bore into the back of his neck, Garr shaking his head.

"No...no! I will not!", he barks, "I will not face him, do you not see?"

"See what? Why?"

"If I face him....then I will die. I know that much."

"You can't kill someone who's already dead."

Garr closes his eyes, shaking his head.

"You would not know..."

"Then that just makes you a coward!"

Garr snaps his eyes open, finding himself in a room of complete darkness...and Ryu is there, facing him down.

"You're a coward, Garr!", Ryu snaps, "You're just letting yourself die like this? What is the matter with you?! Why?!"

"You...do not understand, Ryu," Garr says, balling his hands into fists, "I have come with you only to die."

"Why?"

"Because I will most surely burn in Hades for what I have done. There is no forgiveness for me...only the Stone Sleep, if I visit the Goddess."

"So...you've just come along so you won't pay for your sins, haven't you?"

"Over five hundred Brood died by mine hands, Ryu.", he responds, shakily, "There is no soul more worthy of punishment than I...but if I see the Goddess, I can let Her decide. I can be punished or know peace, on Her whim..."

Ryu shakes his head, closing his eyes.

"There's another way. Don't die on me."

"Why? What of me is worth saving?"

"You have a heart. A heart which is trying to tell you something. Turn around."

"No!"

"Turn around!"

"NO!"

Ryu walks over to him, clad in the Dragon's Armor, and grips his shoulders with unnatural strength.

"Trust me, Garr. Please," he says, "I need your help. You have always been there to save me. Now let me save you."

A silent plea is in his eyes as Garr slowly nods.

"Very well," he says, "Then let us be over with this."

He turns, raising his eyes to his newest apparition.

A grey-skinned gargoyle in a kilt, smaller than him, looking upon him with an expression that blends pity and hatred.

"Hello, Garr."

"Hello, Gaist."

Garr's form spasms, his eyes opening before the glow fades to black.

Ryu walks over, the field crackling to his touch.

The eyes of the dragon symbol light up...and the Beast Spear glows.

"It's finally come to this," Gaist says, shaking his head, "You and I. Brothers in arms. I'm dead, Garr. You know how I am here."

"The Beast Spear. Why?"

"Your heart has always been the best of you. Perhaps it can no longer support your conscience. Your guilt."

He walks over, placing his hand on Garr's shoulder.

"You know what can end this. There is too much weight on your shoulders. No man should burden themselves like you, Guardian or no."

"No...no, Gaist. I am the last of us. It is I who must bear our burden."

The room shakes...and shackles appear on Garr's hands and neck, dragging him down.

"Coward!"

The room becomes layered with ice, sapping Garr's strength as the Guardian grips his teeth, collapsing from the weight of his binds.

"You can end this with a word, you know," Gaist says, walking around his comrade, "The one thing you've never said."

"Gaist...please..."

"One word! That's all it takes! Do you think this is the only way to find redemption? Do you think dragging a boy and his friends, and the woman who cares for him, is the only way to set things straight?"

An ice wall shatters, revealing the bone-built dragon standing behind Gaist.

"Five hundred years, Garr!", Gaist says, "Five hundred years of death after death after death!"

Smoke lashes from the Shadow Dragon's mouth, enveloping Garr and choking the life from his lungs.

"Five hundred years of pain after pain inflicted upon you and them! Is it fair? Is it reasonable? No, it isn't! But why did you chose it?"

"It...it was...it was the only way....Gaist, please..."

A massive claw comes down, driving Garr's knees into the ground as a massive, crimson-scalled dragon appears behind him, an ice and thunder dragon appearing to his sides as more and more of the Brood appear...until five hundred and thirty eight surround them.

"All of them, you slew," Gaist says, leaning against the Beast Spear, "All of them layed down their lives because they knew a war would kill so many innocents. What have you never done? What have you, in five hundred years of guilt and self-hatred, have you never done?'

Garr shakes his head, his breath caught in his throat as he feels the eyes all on him.

"Gaist...why have you done this?"

"I said those words when I layed down my beads and left the Goddess. I have never let my guilt guide me, but you have. You can find new meaning in this quest. Don't avenge them. Don't let their deaths guide you. You have people who you must protect...and can you truly protect them if this is your reason for going on?"

Garr looks down, bracing his hands against the icy ground. And tears begin running down his eyes.

"I'm...I'm sorry," he whispers, his breath shaking in his throat, "I'm sorry..."

One by one, the dragons disappear, their snouts and eyes showing their approval as they fade into mere memory.

"Goddess forgive me," Garr whispers, as his shackles disappear, "I'm sorry..."

Gaist closes his eyes, laying his hand on his comrade's shoulder.

"Two words, Garr," he says, "Two words."

And everything becomes white.

The field shatters as Garr's eyes resume their glow, the dragon symbol fading into stone as Garr rises to his feet.

Rei sighs, shaking his head.

"Yeah, well, that's done with," he says, "Seeya tomorrow. I'm catching some z's."

He hurtles down the stairs, disappearing into a tent as Nina pats Ryu on the shoulder, following the woren.

Ryu smiles, looking at Garr as his shoulders droop.

"Are you alright, Garr?", he asks.

"Yes...yes, I am fine," the Guardian says, smiling faintly, "I think...I am better than I have been in...a long, long time."

Ryu nods, turning to Dragnier.

"Ryu?"

Ryu turns back to Garr, nodding.

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry."

Ryu smiles, nodding.

"It's alright, Garr. I forgive you."

He walks down the stairs, to the village.

Garr turns to where Ladon was, the stone shimmering slightly...and a small chuckle ensues.

"Thank you," Garr says.

He sits down, cross legged.

And for the first time in nearly five centuries, Garr sleeps a peaceful sleep.

****

THE END


End file.
